These days we are influenced by a culture of talk and tweets. We’re told to express our feelings, hold nothing back. We’ve all seen in national news how people’s unrestrained talk and tweets get them into public hot water. Every day I see the relational fallout that comes from thoughtless, foolish, deceitful, and cruel words.
But there are times we ought to keep our negative thoughts and emotions to ourselves and refuse to give them a voice. The Bible warns us that our tongue can be a mighty weapon, for good and for evil. (James 3:6-10). Proverbs says, “Reckless words pierce like a sword” (Proverbs 12:18). We can damage a person’s spirit, family, or reputation by blurting out negative thoughts and feelings without any thought or prayer. Yes, it might temporarily help you feel better when you’re mad or hurt to blurt them out, but I liken blurting to vomit. It does feel better to get vomit out, but vomit belongs in the toilet and not on another person.
It’s not only good for the other person that you learn not to blurt your negative thoughts and feelings during moments of great intensity. It is also good for you.
Proverbs 21:23 says, “He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.”
Proverbs 13:3 says, “He who guards his lips guards his life, but he who speaks rashly will come to ruin.”
1 Peter 3:10 says, “Whoever would love life and see good days must keep his tongue from evil and his lips from deceitful speech.”
Imagine how much better you would feel if you weren’t always complaining or critical of something wrong in your life? How would your relationships be improved if the people in your life weren’t wary of your reckless or deceitful words? How different would you feel about yourself if you weren’t so captured by your own negative feelings and thoughts?
Here are three things you can do to stop blurting.
- Decide: No matter how negatively you feel, make a conscious decision that you will not vomit your toxic emotions out on others. (Don’t get me wrong – you may have to speak some hard words at times, but hard words need not be harsh words). The psalmist determined, “I will watch my ways and keep my tongue from sin; I will put a muzzle on my mouth as long as the wicked are in my presence” (Psalm 39:1).
- Acknowledge the struggle: In Psalm 39 despite his vow to keep silent, the psalmist found keeping quiet tough. Silence didn’t bring the psalmist satisfaction but more anguish (see verses 2 and 3). During a time of anguish and temptation, write a no-send letter venting out your feelings or praying them out to God until you can get a better perspective and calm down.
- Remember the big picture:It’s crucial that you understand that YOU are much more than your temporal thoughts and feelings. We all have negative thoughts and feelings but it’s important to not allow them to have us. Instead of getting stuck in your mood or negative thoughts, remind yourself that you are more than your feelings and you will have to give an account to God for how you handled yourself during times of adversity. Remember your goal (I don’t want to vomit on people), your deeper desires (I want to be a godly person, or I don’t want to have regrets later) or your core values (I want to treat people as I would like to be treated). This practice helps us develop the muscle of restraint and self-control so that we don’t become a slave to our emotions.
Dietrich Bonheoffer said, “Often we combat our evil thoughts most effectively if we absolutely refuse to allow them to be expressed in words…It must be a decisive rule of every Christian fellowship that each individual is prohibited from saying much that occurs to him.”
Decide today that you will no longer let your negative feelings get the best of you and hurt other people.
Go to this link if not found below
06/14/2016 06:10 pm ET
7 Signs Your Partner Is Too Selfish For A Relationship
If you’re only there to stroke his or her ego, it’s time to leave.
JACQUIE BOYD VIA GETTY IMAGES
“Wait, could you stop so I can get a selfie?”
Not everyone you find yourself attracted to is necessary cut out for a relationship. Unfortunately, some people have a long way to go until they’re compassionate and selfless enough to give out genuine love.
Below, therapists and other relationship experts share seven signs the person you’re seeing is too self-centered for a long-term relationship.
- They care more about your career than your character.
If you never feel quite good enough for your partner — and she’s much more interested in what you do than who you are — consider it a big, glaring red flag, said Karyl McBride, a therapist and author of Will I Ever Be Free of You? How to Navigate a High-Conflict Divorce from a Narcissist and Heal Your Family.
“The ‘what you do’ may be status-oriented qualities, like looks or career accomplishments, but often it is about what you ‘do’ for her,” she said. “You will find that your partner is not as interested in who you really are as a person because she lacks the capacity to emotionally tune in and provide empathy. In this situation, you don’t feel seen or heard and often feel invisible.”
- You feel controlled by their many rules.
People with narcissistic personalities put high expectations on others — and when you fail to meet those expectations, judgement almost always follows, said Jan Hill, a Toronto-based counselor and author of Happy Sex: Putting Passion and Play Back into Your Relationship.
“To help you meet those expectations, people with big egos establish rules,” she said. “For example, one narcissist I know wanted his girlfriend to give him 24-hour notice if she was going out with her friends and he wanted to know where she was going. Meanwhile, he maintained spontaneity in his own social life.”
Relationship rules that aren’t applied equally “create resentment, anger and shut down any possibilities for real, respectful and honest love,” Hill said.
- Your partner prioritizes “me” over “we.”
Your partner should value your opinion, embrace a team mentality and consider the collective couple when making decisions, said Samantha Burns, a Boston-based relationship counselor and dating coach. When you’re with a quality partner, your happiness matters just as much as hers.
“If she doesn’t stop to think about your preferences, she likely won’t be able to prioritize your happiness at any point,” Burns said. “This can lead to dissatisfaction, disconnection and a potential breakup.”
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- They sabotage your success.
A narcissistic personality will share the spotlight, but only up to a point. The second your success starts to overshadows his there’s bound to be trouble, Hill said.
“If you have your own career aspirations and your success could take the spotlight off him, he will sabotage you,” she said. “One classic sabotage technique is this: just before your big interview, your partner will make a demand of your time or have an emotional fit that will distract you from your goal and you will fail to achieve to the best of your potential because you were too busy helping out.”
- They never ask, “How was your day?”
Getting home and ranting to your partner about subway outages and your crappy workday is one of the great joys of life. You deserve someone who not only asks, “how was your day, honey?” but actuallylistens to what you have to say, even if your response is 90 percent complaining, Burns said.
“It’s hard to feel like you really matter to someone who always dominates the conversation — it’s as if you’re only there to stroke his ego,” she said “To be with someone who never stops to ask about how your day was is a red flag. The one-sided dynamic can leave you in the shadows and unhappy.”
- They talk over you.
Good luck getting a word in edgewise; a self-centered partner seems to enjoy the sound of her voice a lot more than yours, said Debra Campbell, a psychologist and couple’s therapist in Melbourne, Australia.
“And when you disagree, your partner is more concerned with defending her position than acknowledging your point of view,” she said. “Feeling heard is a vital part of feeling loved, so the result is usually to feel emotionally sidelined when a partner consistently doesn’t listen well.”
- You have to beg your partner to do things you want to do.
Compromise is essential in any healthy relationship. It should worry you if your partner doesn’t care about your opinion, isn’t willing to take “no” for an answer or guilt trips you into making decisions, Burns said.
“You shouldn’t have to beg, nag or pull teeth to get your partner to participate in your activities, whether it’s the vacation spot you’ve been dying to get to, or the restaurant you want to try for dinner,” she said. “Your needs and wants are just as important as hers and you will likely grow resentful if your mate can’t create a healthy balance of compromise.”
What Is My Purpose?: 8 Simple Steps to Find Your Purpose and Live a Life You Love
Have you ever wondered if life has any meaning? Are you here just to survive a little? Is this life meaningless for you?
What if we were created for a purpose?
The ambition to discover the purpose of life is nearly as old as mankind. You have the striving desire to demonstrate yourself and others that you actually do have a purpose and that you are very good at it.
Unfortunately, many of us just waste our time wondering but never doing anything to discover life’s purpose or the true meaning of life.
Start taking action now and get the benefits of discovering your life purpose, the true meaning of your life and discover your personal mission.
By doing it you will start finally moving on the right direction to enjoy every second of a new self-designed meaningful life.
AS ALL OF YOU REALIZE, I RARELY “ASK” YOU TO LISTEN TO ANYTHING!
PLEASE LISTEN TO THIS. I HAVE MYSELF BOUGHT THE BIGGER BUNDLE, BUT THIS ISN’T A SALES PITCH, THIS IS ABOUT OUR CULTURE, WHAT SATAN IS DOING TO OUR KIDS VIA AMUSEMENT.
Last Sunday I heard this program… there are so many mom’s who are Spiritually sensitive, and a few Dad’s too… and I wished I could connect immediately with you and say, you have got to hear this guy! But, I couldn’t. So I have gone to great lengths, trying to search the radio programs for this in the archives, and finally I wrote to the speakers company itself. I not only heard from a worker there within less than 12 hours, today I received a note from the speaker himself. (you may read it below) This human knows the Word, and feels that “the day” is very soon coming for Jesus return…. This non-profit company is printing books and making CD’s to get God’s truth out there NOW… It is urgent! Pay attention to his definitions of words! This is most fascinating. We are like sheep! we are so easily lead by the “crowd”! We are allowing this Culture to take us into the la-la land of amusement, exactly as some of you have heard me say before…I am not gonna tell ya! YOU, have got to take a listen!! Hey there Grandma’s! …..Here is a low cost gift for the kids at Christmas this year but it is worth its weight in spiritually influential gold! And if you know any book lovers… get it for them too! As I said.. I am gonna read these books too! and wait until you read what Mark says to me in the end of his note! GO AHEAD… LISTEN NOW… TURN IT UP SO YOUR WHOLE HOUSE LISTENS!!!!!
HEY RICK! I have something here I want you to hear!
Thank you for contacting us. Someone may have already gotten back to you but I wanted to personally send you a note. We are not sure what program you listened to, but my hunch is that is was the broadcast from thie following link:”
This second link is from our daily radio broadcast. If it isn’t either of these, please let me know. The first one, I believe is the one you will want to share with you people.
Blessings to you! ps. if you ever need any recommendations about the books or audios, let me know. I love to connect people with the right story. And btw, most of our readers are adults!
Paul Tripp Ministries, Inc.
A LIFESTYLE OF SERIOUSNESS
This is the fourth and final devotional from Hebrews 10:19-31. If you’ve missed any in the past, you can always catch up at http://www.PaulTripp.com/Wednesday.
“For if we go on sinning deliberately after receiving the knowledge of the truth, there no longer remains a sacrifice for sins […] It is a fearful thing to fall into the hands of the living God.” (Hebrews 10:26-31)
I don’t have the space to unpack all these verses, but it’s crucial that we see how sin is talked about in this passage. Sin is not described as a breaking of some abstract law; sin is presented as a direct affront to the Triune God.
Look at the words used in these verses: “trampled underfoot the Son of God” […] “profaned the blood of the covenant” […] “outraged the Spirit of grace.” That’s serious language.
We live in a culture that doesn’t take sin seriously anymore. We call it “powerful advertising” – we ignore, minimize, laugh at, and sometimes even praise what God calls sin. We’ve fallen into the trap of thinking that sin isn’t so bad after all.
Brothers and sisters, we need to take sin incredibly seriously. Yes, the penalty for sin has been paid, but you can still be a Christian and ruin your life because you don’t take seriously the consequences of your sin.
Galatians 6:7 says, “Do not be deceived: God is not mocked, for whatever one sows, that will he also reap.” There is a direct correlation between the choices of your heart and the quality of your life.
Perhaps even more importantly, you can’t celebrate the beauty of the gospel until you recognize the ugliness of sin. Jesus becomes so much more precious when you realize just what He has rescued you from.
I would encourage you today – take seriously the consequence of your actions, and take seriously the ugly nature of your sin. Your life and your Savior grow in beauty as you do.
Paul David Tripp
Why might a law feel “easier” to break if its abstract instead of personal?
How does our culture ignore, minimize, laugh at or praise sin?
How did you ignore, minimize, laugh at or praise sin this past week?
How have you seen a direct correlation between the choices of your heart and the quality of your life?
How does Jesus become more precious as you take sin more seriously?
Paul Tripp Ministries, Inc.
REMEMBER WITH SPECIFICITY
Two weeks ago I wrote to you about trouble. I may not know who you are or what your life has been like, but I can almost guarantee that trouble has paid a visit, is currently visiting, or will visit your life in some capacity.
When trouble comes, it’s vital that you talk to yourself. I teach this principle all the time – no one is more influential in your life than you are because no one talks to you as much as you do. What you say to you in moments of trouble will impact the way you respond.
David was a man well acquainted with trouble. Poor David; if you read the Psalms, he always seems to be in trouble! But in these moments, David was always talking to himself. We saw this in Psalm 27 – “The Lord is my light and my salvation; whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life; of whom shall I be afraid?” (Psalm 27:1)
There’s something else David did in times of trouble that’s very helpful; it’s found in Psalm 4 – “Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have given me relief when I was in distress. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer!” (Psalm 4:1, ESV, emphasis mine)
In the midst of trouble, David remembered the acts of God. Notice how the above phrase is in the past tense – “you have given me relief when I was in distress.” He’s not thanking the Lord for currently relieving his distressing circumstances.
What can we learn from David? In times of trouble, it’s helpful to remember with specificity the past acts of God’s relieving mercy and grace.
You and I have such a short-term memory. Because of sin, we’re all about the gratification and pleasure of today. When trouble comes knocking, we get absorbed in the immediate, forgetting what God has delivered us from in the past and what he’s transforming us into for the future.
David speaks gospel sense to his soul: “Remember, this is not new. I’ve experienced trouble in the past and God was good to me then. He remains good to me today, and what I’m facing is not out of his loving and wise rule.”
I would guess that David learned this theological skill from his ancestors. In the Old Testament, God stops the rushing waters of the Jordan River so the nation of Israel can cross on dry land. The Lord tells Joshua to set out 12 memorial stones. Why? “So that all the peoples of the earth may know that the hand of the Lord is mighty.” (Joshua 4:24)
I would encourage you to take notes from Joshua and David. Remember, with specificity, the good things God has done for you. Journal, take a picture, or do whatever else can help you, so when trouble comes knocking, you can say like David, “You have given me relief when I was I distress.”
Paul David Tripp
How often do you talk to yourself?
Reflect on some of the things you’ve said to yourself in the past week. What were you saying to you?
What, or who, are some influences that can shape what you say to you?
What are some examples from your life when God has given you relief from distress?
How can you create “memorial stones” to remind yourself that the hand of the Lord is mighty?
Paul Tripp Ministries, Inc.
BE ANGRY. DON’T SIN.
Last week I encouraged you to remember with specificity the good things the Lord has done for you. Today we return to Psalm 4 and continue to learn how to suffer well.
In the midst of his trouble and grief, King David says to himself, “Be angry, and do not sin.” (Psalm 4:4) This can be a confusing verse, because in most of Scripture, isn’t anger categorized as a sin?
For example: “Man’s anger does not bring about the righteous life that God desires” (James 1:2); “Anger resides in the lap of fools” (Ecclesiastes 7:9); “Do not associate with one easily angered” (Proverbs 22:24); “You must rid yourselves of […] anger…” (Colossians 3:8)
So if the Bible defines anger as a sin in many places, how can David say, “Be angry, and do not sin” without contradicting God’s Word? Here’s a principle to remember: the ‘biblical acceptability’ of your anger depends upon the law which you’re angrily defending.
Think about it this way: how much of your anger last week was a result of you angrily defending the law of God? Were you angered by injustice and political corruption? Were you angered by Christians being persecuted? Were you angered by the weak being exploited?
Sadly, that anger doesn’t last very long. Frequently my anger is a result of me angrily defending another law – the law of me. I get angry when someone changes the channel, when they add something to my schedule, or when they request I give up something to serve them.
The same principle applies to anger and suffering. Most of the things you suffer from are angering to God: bodies weren’t designed to break, people weren’t created to betray, and governments weren’t established to abuse. Suffering in a fallen world should make you angry because suffering almost always correlates with God’s law being broken in some way.
But all too often, we’re angry because the suffering inconveniences our little kingdom. It robs us of money, time, comfort, and pleasure. We’re not grieved and angry in unison with God; in fact, in many cases, we’re angry at God for allowing such things to come our way.
So when suffering enters your door, you should be furious. But your anger should be motivated by the law of God, not the law of self. It’s much easier for me to write that than to live it, but Christ provides abundant daily grace for our anger problems.
For a deeper discussion on how to be good and angry at the same time, check out my curriculum by the same name: How to be Good and Angry.
Paul David Tripp
What are some current events that should anger you as a Christian?
How can you translate your anger into Christ-exalting action?
When are the most common occurrences of your anger?
What does your anger reveal about your heart?
How can you seek help for your anger?
Be sure to add “firstname.lastname@example.org” to your address book.
Emotional Cheating: Are You Guilty?
.By Marianne Wait
WebMD FeatureReviewed by Arefa Cassoobhoy, MD, MPH
Like many women, René (who asked that only her middle name be used), a writer from northern New Jersey, had two husbands: a regular spouse and a “work husband,” a man — interesting, smart, funny — with whom she spent 9 hours a day. The chemistry was obvious, but nothing ever “happened.” Or did it?
They made a beeline for each other every morning, and their chats became more and more personal. “I definitely talked to him about things I didn’t talk to my husband about, including my husband, because my marriage was so unhappy,” René says. He sat a little too close at meetings. She admits she fantasized about a relationship.
Recommended Related to Sex & RelationshipsNew Money Rules for Couples
By Virginia Sole-Smith Nothing makes me feel more overtly “married” than when I open up my wallet to pay at Home Depot and pull out the shiny blue debit card labeled, in big block type, SHARED. My husband, Dan, broke out the label maker two months after we got married to distinguish the cards linked to our joint account from the identical blue debit cards we use for our separate personal checking accounts. (And in the rush of newlywed excitement, it didn’t occur to him to use a more discreet…
Read the New Money Rules for Couples article > >
Was she cheating? Gail Saltz, MD, associate professor of psychiatry at New York-Presbyterian Hospital/Weill Cornell School of Medicine, says “probably.”
“Many of these emotional affairs do move into a sexual affair,” Saltz says. “If they don’t, it’s easy enough to say to yourself that you’re not doing anything wrong.”
The problem, she says, is the attachment to this other person impacts the marriage. “Ultimately it ends painfully one way or another: Your marriage ends, or you’ve got to give this person up.” René’s marriage eventually ended in divorce, but this doesn’t have to happen to you.
Continue reading below…
Often, people who become involved in emotional affairs feel something is lacking at home. “It makes them feel good to feel understood, to feel desired. It’s like candy. You go home and have your vegetables, and you go to work and you have candy.”
For some spouses — more often women, Saltz says — learning of an emotional affair can be worse than discovering sexual infidelity. “Everybody understands a sexual act need not necessarily contain affection or intimacy. It could be literally about a sexual act. Whereas the emotional affair feels like it’s much more about being connected, about loving or liking.”
Signs You’ve Crossed the Line
According to Saltz, these seven red flags suggest you may have entered into an emotional affair:
1.You spend a lot of emotional energy on the person. “You end up sharing stuff that you don’t even share with your partner — hopes and dreams, things that would actually connect you to your partner.”
2.You dress up for that person.
3.You make a point to find ways to spend time together, and that time becomes very important to you.
4.You’d feel guilty if your partner saw you together; you are doing things and saying things that you would never do or say in front of your spouse.
5.You share your feelings of marital dissatisfaction.
6.You’re keeping secret the amount of time you’re spending with the person (including emailing, calling, texting).
7.You start to feel dependent on the emotional high that comes with the relationship.
I grew up wealthy enough to know how to have a good time. Sunny days beckoned shopping in outdoor malls, lunch at local restaurants and grabbing some ice cream afterwards. A free concert in the park was nice, but couldn’t replace days of browsing at a book store and getting coffee on my way to buy some new shoes.
Moses says to Israel, as they anticipate finding a home in the Promised Land:
“So commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these words of mine. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. Teach them to your children. Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates, so that as long as the sky remains above the earth, you and your children may flourish in the land the Lord swore to give your ancestors” (Deuteronomy 11:18-21).
Ecclesiastes tells us, as do various proverbs, to enjoy our friends and food during our short existence. But for me, my enjoyment of those things stole away pleasures like walking through cool, wooded paths and thinking about God’s power and creativity. Pleasures like the strength of my little sister’s arms around me before I fly away again to a place far from her.
I think in this section of Deuteronomy Moses is telling the people how important it is to remember God’s words, his laws and promises, throughout the ordinary experiences of their day. I think he’s telling Israel to find God in the most common places and to use those findings to bring their hearts closer to him.
Seeing God in ordinary places will look different for everyone. Some of us will recite the Bible to our children; others will simply talk about truth we observe. Some of us will buy plaques with Bible verses, or write them on post-its, or copy them in journals. The point isn’t how we remind ourselves to find God in the trees and in the everyday rain, but whether or not we do at all.
This young man is amazing and a great inspiration to do God’s work.
What is invalidation? How often have I done it to others? How often has it happened to me?
The story behind this picture is this:
Every day – at the same time – she, the dog, waits for him, cat.
Sometimes she barks to call him.
He comes; they rub and greet each other and they go for a walk.
They have done this for 5 years and no, they don’t belong to the same owners. The owners didn’t know until neighbors, seeing them together so frequently, commented to the cat’s owner, who then followed the dog home and discovered it was a distance away, not in a house close by or next door. How it started no one knows.
Wouldn’t it be great to have friends like this, always there, no words needed, they just intuitively recognize the value of each other in their lives and act accordingly. Live, Laugh, Love. Life is not the way it’s supposed to be. It’s the way it is. The way we cope with it is what makes the difference.
A wise person once said, “There comes a time in life, when you walk away from all the drama and people who create it. You surround yourself with people who make you laugh, forget the bad, and focus on the good. So love the people who treat you right, pray for the ones who don’t. Life is too short to be anything but happy.” It is a choice.
Falling down is a part of life, getting back up is living.
Marriage is a matter of life time commitment. It was a law put into place by God. God wanted a place of security for “family”, for mothers and babes and Relationships. Keep in mind that God came up with Laws, rules, or “just say No”, for reasons that are good for You, me the children and family, not for Himself! He put life into place and gave us instructions how it would work out best, considering He was going to pass out some ‘free-will’ too, I think He did a great loving thing here. However, That damned devil isn’t going to have it! I mean he isn’t going to Hell alone that is! He plans on stealing as many humans that Jesus died for, from Him as he can. Today, it looks like he is taking a lot with him.
Recently I heard a teaching from Adrian Rogers for which I had to go back and rewind the tapes numerous times to write down what was said:
Adultery is a sin against the “Home”. Innocent children’s lives are torn apart every year by Adultery. The man who commits adultery tells his child, ” your mother is not worth much.” And he tells his children, “Your father is a liar and a cheat.” Furthermore, Honor is not nearly as important as pleasure. “In, fact my child, my own satisfaction and pleasure are more important than you are.” (And, of course, vice versa.)
God established monogamous marriage to meet the deepest emotion physical psychological & spiritual needs of a child. Children need a home and sexual faithfulness is the glue of the family which is the basic foundation of society.
Why is Adultery such a hurtful, heinous, damning, terrible hellish sin? Because Adultery is a sin against ‘Self’. (see Corinthians 6:18 Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body ) There is no sin that does as much damage physically and psychologically. (Consider STD’s, Aids, cancer, abortions, depression, mistrust, division, separation & divorce) oh, and Safe sex?…. God’s sex wasn’t made to be dangerous! (Romans 2:22 You who say that people should not commit adultery, do you commit adultery? You who abhor idols, do you rob temples? 23 You who boast in the law, do you dishonor God by breaking the law? 24 As it is written: “God’s name is blasphemed among the Gentiles because of you.) …. end of insert sermon notes….
We who call ourselves Christians, we commit another form of adultery against Jesus (are we not His Bride?) when we put ourselves on the Throne in the middle of our “World”. Or maybe when we put our Desires first, instead of God’s, our Pleasures,… our Happiness, our must watch TV even, before God… so everyone of us can hurt from adultery, but Jesus, God hurts too…Especially when He heard us commit to Him. What does our relational walk and talk glorify?
A woman’s response to “Beautiful advice from a divorced man after 16 years of marriage”
What is depression? It is a normal natural response to loss. When you lose a personal relationship, this is as major a loss as you can have in life. Depression is the result! You can lose your home to fire and experience the very same depth of loss. The pain is the same! I know because I have experienced it. People and things we invest in, gone or taken from us are a loss. Our very Soul recoils in pain. Do not get down on yourself for this! Take care of your soul as you would your child…. Be gentle, it is on track towards healing.
Proverbs 13:12 says Hope deferred makes the heart grow sick.
Don’t believe those worthless “feelings”. In fact, Feelings lie at times! Some will tell you otherwise, but there is a difference between instinct or intuition, and “feelings”. You may feel that this will never end. But if you follow wisdom, you will heal and this too shall pass. One day you will look back and it will just be a ‘memory’. The feelings will have faded.
So, in seeking wisdom, read your book, do the homework, Center on Jesus, His plan, His love for us each as an individual. Take one day at a time, feel the pain, learn from it, if you are depressed more than four weeks and it is making you worse off, a bit of medication may be needed. It will not take away your pain or the feelings, but will buffer it so that you can manage your responsibilities a little better and “think” better.
Chart your feeling on a calendar or in your book. Watch The Lord act and orchestrate, in your life.
Jesus, be my Center. Amen