The price of always being nice …
- The “nice” person tends to create an atmosphere that keeps others from giving honest feedback. This limits growth.
- The “nice” behavior leaves uncertainty in others in that they can not be sure of support in crisis situation that demand candor or in confrontation with others.
- “Nice” behavior stifles growth by depriving others level feedback and a “real” person to relate to. This tends to force others to turn their aggression inward against themselves. Guilt and depression can follow.
- The chronic “niceness” leaves others uncertain whether the relationship could withstand a conflict or sustain angry, spontaneous, confrontation. Intimacy is limited by a felt need to be constantly on guard.
- “Nice” guys are more subject to periodic rage explosions, which erupt unexpectedly when others are unprepared for it.
- Physical ills can abound!
Therefore, it’s not nice to play nice!!!